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Selling Mediation

Leading up to our Selling Mediation workshop later this year, we thought it would be helpful to explore this subject a little.

Selling mediation seems at first sight to be something that many of us will naturally shy away from. Mediators, after all, are not part of a salesforce or work in a consumer based sector. They are not motivated by sales targets or financial results. So why would we use the phrase selling? It is because here in the UK community mediation does need to be sold. Many people who are in conflict have never heard of mediation - they may confuse it with meditation or even medication! For others they may have either a limited understanding or the entirely false understanding of what mediation is. But there is more to the word selling. For ‘selling’ implies a commitment, positivity and an eagerness from the mediator to help people engage and “buy in” to the process.

A good summary

In this blog I will talk about summarising. For those who know anything about mediation, you will know that the mediator is not there to make suggestions or force people to an agreement. What they are there for however is to help all parties involved move forward and find a way to negotiate and reach an agreement. One of the skills that can help is summarising.

So what good is there in a summary? A good summary can achieve several things:

· it is an opportunity to check your own understanding of what has been said

· it provides all parties in the meeting to hear again - in shorthand - what has been said by all parties. Remember that this meeting is probably the first time a party will have heard, calmly and from a place of safety, a different perspective

· it demonstrates to both clients that they have been listened to

· it holds up a mirror to them, allowing time to reflect on what they have said, on how they’re feeling. It allows them to perhaps change their perspective slightly, to say “That’s not what I said, that’s not what I meant” even if you have accurately summarised what they said.

A fair stooshie

In our most recent podcast we heard from Caitlin who talked about her experiences of mediation. One of the things that she talked about was the importance of open questions and summarising. Helping people who are in conflict is the lot of a mediator, however I believe everyone can learn some of the skills we teach on our course and use them in everyday life, not just in mediations. Let’s begin with open questions.

An open question is one that someone cannot just answer with a “yes” or a “no”. Open questions are a good way to find out directly from the parties involved, exactly what is going on for them. Open questions when used well, removes a lot of the value judgements or assumptions that can creep in. Let me give you an example.

Latest podcast now launched

We are delighted to announce that our latest podcast has now gone live. In it, you can hear from Caitlin, who took part on our Mediation Skills training in 2024. She talks about her experience of mediation both in the US and Scotland and her reflections on what she has learnt from our training.